The Brooklyn Chronicles, Inc., is a lifestyle blog that promotes Peace & Love. Encouraging healthy lifestyle, from relationships to good nutrition. Barbara interviews and uplifts Brooklynites that have experienced some of life's most adverse circumstances. Connection with another person in any capacity that is positive is priceless! Barbara teaches through her own personal experiences in love, loss and adversity. She focuses on the importance of self-love, while emphasizing that deep connection with the Creator, God, Jesus, and the Spirit are key to liberation from all of the chains that bind us. The ultimate result is a happy and joyful life free of baggage.
Barbara A. Crooks graduated from St. John's University (Queens Campus) in 2005 with a B.A. in Sociology. She enjoys promoting and encouraging healthy positive relationships that are built on love. She understands that the key to loving another unconditionally is to 1st love, know, and accept oneself wholeheartedly. The journey to loving oneself isn't always easy and one may encounter many obstacles along the way. She offers advice through her own experiences, which she hopes will assist readers on their journey. She is a loving mother of three beautiful & bright children. Barbara was born and raised in Brooklyn, New York. She now resides in Queens, New York with her children.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
"He Cheated With You...Now What?" (Cosmo News)
So I'm on the train yesterday when I came across a fabulous article in Cosmos May 2010 edition. The article was thought provoking for me on numerous levels. One because it nearly sugar coated cheating/infidelity by giving readers an entirely different way of looking at the subject. In the article, the woman the guy cheats with is described as, "levelheaded, and normal", vs. "a skanky ho". In summary, the article paints a scenario of you meet a guy, he has a girlfriend yet he's not married and/or engaged to the woman. He feels stuck in the relationship and for one reason or another the guy doesn't have the "courage" to walk away. As I continued reading on my commute I kept thinking to myself that if I were the "levelheaded", "normal" chick described then I don't see how I would be able to trust the guy in a relationship. I would always think back to when he was cheating on his girlfriend. On the other hand I agreed with the article in regard to the realization that not everyone is "100 percent single", especially at this stage in the game. I'm approaching my mid-thirties and this article made me look at cheating in a whole new way. It points out that if we're in a relationship and decide not to marry someone it's because we know that they are not someone we want to spend the rest of our lives with. So if the guy you meet is attached but not committed by engagement or marriage then why isn't he considered fair game? Is this a relationship doomed for future disaster or is it possible that it's the start of a beautiful healthy relationship based on the fact that the guy eliminates the girl that isn't good for him and chooses you? Let's talk about it...
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I dont think he cheated on her, due to the fact that he wanted to leave, so finding someone new is just what the doctor ordered even if engaged or married, so the levelheaded chick need to trust the guy. And about marring, i have to support your comment, if shes everythin to him i see no reason why not. why say no to a certificate saying u are each others.
ReplyDeleteHi Majyt, great response and basically that's what the entire article was trying to prove that there really is chance for the new couple because the initial relationship wasn't something he was into and he chose the person he really wanted. I'm just personally such a believer in karma and I think I would always look at the guy a little funny. For example, what if things get rocky and he starts coming home late. I'm automatically going to think he's with another woman.
ReplyDeleteI think when a relationship blossoms under those circumstances there is always the thought that the dude may do what he did to "her" to you. At the same time, you being insecure or jealous is only going to hurt the relationship you are trying to build. Give it a chance, things may not work out. At the same time the relationship might grow into something beautiful.
ReplyDeleteWELL FOR ANALOGIES SAKE I WOULDN'T LEAVE A JOB/CAREER WITHOUT HAVING A BACK UP PLAN OR SOMETHING ELSE "VISUALLY PHYSICALLY & EMOTIONALLY" BETTER. UNLESS OF COURSE IT WAS AN ABUSIVE SITUATION AND DETRAMENTAL TO ME OR MY KIDS WELL BEING.
ReplyDeleteWELL "BCC" WORLD IT JUST STUMPS ME SOMETIMES BCUZ WE NEVER KNOW HOW HAPPY WE COULD BE WITH THE "FORBIDDEN" FRUIT BUT, WE DEFINATELY KNOW HOW HAPPY WE AREN'T WITHOUT IT
@CharliFamous welcome and that's exactly what the article said, give it a chance and there is really a chance since at no point was there a ring. @Karream thank you and welcome the article pointed out what you said as well that no one leaves something for nothing so you are right on with your comment.
ReplyDeleteI had to read this three times...lol
ReplyDeleteI honestly disagree with this article...
Is this what we have to resort to this day in age? If dude is unhappy and haven't left there is a reason he is staying around...Period, point blank. Most people... if they are unhappy especially men have no issue with bouncing.Unless you got those insecure cats that hold onto A until he gets good with B and then yet in still he still dealing with A to some degree...lol
I think if a man/women cheated with you they will cheat on you.
So basically in the 2010 its "if your not married your single now?" Dayum and even if your married you still get mad dudes/chicks hitting on you...If your in a relationship regardless or not leave it before entering another..Karma always comes back three folds...
Madness...
Hey Mocha:
ReplyDeleteYes indeed Karma always comes back around! The Cosmo article tried to point out that if the couple wasn't engaged then there was a reason for that and that if the other participant was looking elsewhere they really just weren't happy in the first place. I'm a firm believer that a man or woman should be able to make a clean break yet on the flip side in today's society with so many "playing house" and making real "married folk" purchases like cars and homes, clean breaks really are not that clean anymore. It's such a complicated discussion and for the person taking the risk to get involved with the not so honest cheater may have a hard time trusting their new beau.